Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Oh the change that school brings(by change I mean stress!)

So...don't get me wrong, I adore school, but I'm a little stressed out. I read for hours at night either Shakespeare or C.S. Lewis and my brain wants to explode afterwards! I'm reading some Oscar Wilde on the side so I can actually have a break in reading something I don't have to overanalyze every second. This shows how much of an English Major I am, that on the side as a "break" I'm reading a Brittish playwright/critic. My Grammer teacher is absolutely ridiculous and he told me today that he was thinking of not allowing me to come into class today-yikes! When I'm not stressed out at school-I've been super stressed out at work! Just as I have been thinking of quitting the Dr., just about every patient has told me how much they like and appreciate me. I almost cried with what one of the patients said. Yesterday a man came in because the catholic church makes a person have a psychological exam before they will perform an excorcism-creepy huh? When he went in the office I just stood right outside, laying hands on the door and praying. It helped get rid of any fear I had-cause hello-God is sooo much more powerful. And on top of all of this I have been getting tons of pressure from my dad to move back home after this semester! aaaggghhhh!!!!! What's scary is I actually thought about it for a day-then I had to do a genogram for my marriage & family class which just plots out all of my family and things like: death, marriage, divorce, alcohol/drug abuse, sexual and physical abuse and all that fun stuff. Everyone had crazy stuff attached to them and then there was my little circle. There should have been a symbol for having Christ in my life because that is the only reason I'm a sane person without crazy problems in my family. I'm so blessed to be where I am. I'm listening to this song right now by Nichole Nordeman called "Why?"(please listen to it if you have a chance)and it's a song from the point of view of both a little girl and God during the crucifixion-it's amazing. Just a great reminder of God love for us and willingness to sacrifice for us-shouldn't I also be so willing to sacrifice all my insecurities, shortcomings and worries to him?

Saturday, September 10, 2005

I miss my nephew!

I know this is an awful picture(so blurry), but it's so cute to me because I took this picture when I was about to leave and he was so sad that I was leaving he wouldn't smile and he wouldn't even look at the camera! So...when I'm sad and missing someone or anything I write-that's what you do when you're an English Major! So-here it goes:

How much do I love you?
How much would you say?
"More than the night?" he asked
"More than the day?"
Oh, much more than that
And let me tell you why-
You made me an aunt
You're the apple of my eye
You're growing so fast now
Into such a handsome boy
Each time I come see you
You bring my heart such joy
I love you like no one
I've ever loved before
An instant connection
From the moment you were born
What would I do for you?
How far would you say?
"Would you do anything?" he asked
"Walk as far as the earth lay?"
Oh much more than that
Let me tell you how far-
I'd walk right up to the sky
And grab you the shiniest star
I love you so much
And you'll never quite know
The battles I'll fight for you
And depths to which I'll go
So, if you ever feel alone
Or just under the weather
Know that I'm here for you
Always and forever!!!!