Thursday, March 12, 2009

Goodbye was nice knowing you!

Well, I've about had as much as one human being can handle. I have to quit my job! There is no way that one update on my blog could sufficiently depict the plethora of reasons why I must escape, but know that they are all legit. This has honestly been the most awful work week of my life...and I still have one more day to go.

Last week, I went to the doctor's office and she told me that I probably need to be on some sort of anti-depressent after I told her my job situation(just like all the other teachers are on). I think that I am a pretty happy person and explained that I would rather try some natural approaches to relieving stress rather than drugs. Although, after this week...a big ol' bottle of zanex sounds rrreeeaaalll nice. It's almost comical the way teacher's have worked out bargaining over several different medications. Also, the new and improved diets that some must adapt to once they have begun teaching at this school(starting the morning with 3 vicodin and a cup of coffee).

Is this how all teachers feel? Or just teachers at a Christian School? The teachers that I know from public schools, just stick to being an alcoholic, while us Christian teachers seem to mix drugs and alcohol like professional streetwalkers. I actually catch myself watching the bums from my window and being insanely jealous of their carefree life of collecting bottles, pondering a place to bathe, and wondering what new disease they may have. With an economy as ludicrous as ours, I feel the need to just deal with my unhappiness and be thankful that I have a job. But, what is the price that I'm willing to pay on my sanity, just to pay the bills? Maybe I should just give up..."Into the Wild" style!

Wednesday, March 04, 2009

Thank You Power Outage..

There have been a lot of heavy rainstorms in the Sacramento area lately. For most this has meant:
-being on the road with obnoxious drivers
-dealing with grumpy, wet, annoyed people as you make your way in public
-peeling layers of leaves off your porch everyday

However, for me this has created a 5 day weekend. On Sunday night, all of us teachers received a text saying that school was cancelled on Monday due to electric problems. This was probably the most exciting news that one can receive on the eve of a workweek. Then on Monday we received the same message for today. This was a joyous occasion. I was able to enjoy a leisurely afternoon having lunch with some of my fellow teachers, bought a very precious apron on sale at anthropologie and spend the day chit chatting with friends. Couldn't get much better right? Wrong. We received another text that there is still no electricity at our school. We will not have classes until Thursday...and that's us keeping our fingers crossed.

Since I've been having my days and nights consumed with free time, it's given me time to ponder my life and what I have been doing with it. I'm at such an odd crossroad right now. I feel miserable at my job, but my friendships and the people I've been surrounding myself with lately are absolutely amazing. I've actually been going back to church and it's given me a joy that is unexplainable and a also a sadness that is almost unbearable. I'm not sure if that makes sense, but it's honest. I haven't quite figured out what it all means and I need to start doing with my life, but then again...who does?

The most important thing one can do is to just ask questions and seek change and hope in ones own life. So, I guess that's kinda where I am. I think I'll try to get back into writing tomorrow on my additional day off.